Monday, January 2, 2012

January 2nd

Happy 2012! Aaaaand, I'll lead off with this: Last night, and for the past week, I have had "death insomnia" - do you know it? The kind where you're sleeping, or just falling into that sweet snoozy space - and you jerk awake with the dark realization that, yes indeed, you will one day die. It's a fear that grips with icy fingers around my heart and brain, and something I can't escape once it begins. Oh, I can stop thinking about the death part, but now it's a briny toss of horrible thoughts and feelings for ever and ever and on and on. All of a sudden it's 6 am and you're ready to cry/scream/throw the covers off/give up. Or at least I am. Then, sweet relief from the wormhole of anxiety - from 6 until 11 some rem, and then *poof* the vampire awakes, ready for the day. Luckily, my amazing pal Taraleigh gently nudged me into the universe of people who live in the light, and I met her at my first yoga class in 6 months. AND I signed up for a monthly pass, so I can go as many times as I'd like (no pressure, no pressure, take it slow babe) But Holy holy, that felt good. I mean, I almost barfed a few times, and everyone else seemed to be able to work their core like they were filing their nails, but I got through it. And then TL and I ate big salads and did a NYE run-down, which was fun. Anyhow, this basically takes me up until now, this minute, the minute I've made the decision to go to one of my fave restaurants in Toronto for Soon Dobu. The plan is to bundle up and hike to Bloor Street, make face-love to the bowl, and trek back home. Sers, this stuff is like an aura-cleanser. A perfect start to the New Year, I think. Fingers crossed for deep dreams for all of us tonight - and from me, perhaps more interesting posts about things other than the minutiae of daily life.

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